Call Me Romano
by LoviTomato
Summary: Lovino is a high school drop out and lives with his younger brother and his father. While living in a poor house-hold Lovino has to do what he feels he needs to do to support his family,even if he has to keep a whole part of his life a secret.SpainxRomano
1. I am Lovino, I am Romano

**Okay, so here it is ^-^ Call Me Romano. I had fun writing this and I have a few ideas as to what I have planed for future chapters. I already have part of chapter 2 written out, so I hope to have it finished soon. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia**

**Thanks to _Chi Kyoku_ who beta-read this for me ^-^**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter One  
**

The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and Lovino Vargas was awoken from his sleep by both of these annoyances. He growled as he rolled his head underneath his pillow and groaned. As he did this, he felt two warm arms wrap around him and pull him closer. Lovino did not mind this, though he would never admit to liking the feeling of someone else holding him. He let his body relax a bit and snuggled closer to the warmth of his little brother.

Lovino was not sure when it had started happening, but whenever Lovino fell asleep alone in his bed, he would always wake up being held by his brother. The first few times, Lovino had yelled at Feliciano to "get the hell out of his bed and put some damn clothes on," but, after a while, they had fallen into a sweet pattern of waking up like this.

The smell of breakfast wafted down the hall of their apartment and into their shared bedroom, and Lovino realized that his stomach was starting to growl. He glanced down at his bare chest and then at his thin waist. For a moment, he contemplated whether or not it would be okay to just eat a little bit of food this morning, skip lunch, then have a snack later before he had to go to work. After all, he could not afford to suffer any unnecessary delays.

He gently pulled his arm away from Feliciano, intending on softly waking him up – but, before he could stop himself, he swung his hand down hard on his brother's cheek. Feliciano jerked awake, startled, and glanced at his brother with a confused expression. "Ve~... Why did you do that?" he asked, now holding his cheek.

"Because, oh Dumb One, Dad's making food and I'm sure he's almost done by now. Put some clothes on, too. How many times do I have to tell you I hate waking up next to my brother when he's naked?" Lovino huffed and rolled out of bed, naked as well, to look for the pajamas he only wore around the house, but never to bed. He pulled on his pajama pants and, not bothering with a shirt, left the room.

It was just as Lovino had said; their dad was finished cooking and in the process of placing their plates on the table. He looked over at his older son and grinned a little. "Oh, Lovino, are you actually going to eat with us this morning?" he teased.

Lovino rolled his eyes and took his seat at the table. His stomach was growling like mad; it might have been from not eating lunch or dinner the day before and only drinking water throughout the day. Maybe that was why his dad always picked on him for not eating.

Lovino stared at the plate his father put in front of him. Its contents were simple: eggs, bacon, and toast. _It's not that much, _he thought. _I should be able to get away with just eating this._ He picked up his fork and began picking at his food, nibbling slightly on his toast. After a moment, he looked up at his father, who was staring at him. "What?" Lovino demanded, annoyed.

"I worry about you, Lovi. Recently you've been different, and... I just worry a lot, okay?" his father said, sighing. Lovino stiffened when his father ran a hand though his hair before walking back to the counter to make Feliciano's plate.

After everyone had eaten, Feliciano kissed their father on the cheek and smiled before running over to give his brother a large hug and kiss as well. Lovino stood still in grudging acceptance; he knew that, if he refused, his brother would only cry. Feliciano hugged him tightly, arms around his waist, and pulled him close to his smaller body.

"Feliciano, if you don't hurry the fuck up with your stupid hug, you're going to be late…" Lovino pushed on his brother weakly to get him to move, but Feliciano stubbornly refused. After a moment longer, Feliciano pulled away. For a second Lovino could see something in his eyes, though he was not sure what. Feliciano waved happily to his family before he ran out of the front door on his way to school.

And that was how Lovino spent most of his mornings now. He remembered the times when he used to get ready for school like his brother, but that was in the past now. He did not need school; he had quit school to get a job and support his family. He worked with one of his father's old friends, who owned a fancy restaurant not far from where they lived.

He told his family that this was where his large paycheck came from, and they believed him.

* * *

Noon came too soon for Lovino. The walk to the restaurant was only about half an hour at most if he managed to catch the bus, but if he happened to miss the bus, he would be walking until his feet hurt, and that was not something he felt like dealing with tonight.

As he sat at the bus stop, Lovino felt something hit his face. Looking up, he realized that it was beginning to rain. "Damn it!" Lovino slammed his fist into the metal pole of the bus stop sign. "I can't afford to get stuck in this rain and get sick." He let out a frustrated sigh and pulled his hood over his head.

It wasn't long before the bus finally came and he was on his way to the restaurant. He knew, however, that when his shift at the restaurant was over, his real work would begin.

After leaving early, Lovino pulled his hood over his head again and began walking to his next job. It was much farther than where his family knew he worked, so he always got a ride from one of his fellow co-workers. Lovino was not fond of having to get a ride with them, but it was better than walking ten miles after his shift working as a waiter.

He stood at the corner of the block, waiting for his ride to arrive and shivering slightly in the cool November air. The rain had picked up somewhat since his shift had ended and was beginning to soak though his thin jacket. Lovino pulled out his cell phone to check the time and realized that his ride probably wouldn't arrive for another ten minutes or so. As he went to put the phone away, it began ringing.

"Hello?" he answered in his normal rude manner. "What do you want, Feliciano?"

"I'm sorry to bother you... I just thought you would be off work by now," Feliciano replied, sounding somewhat hurt by his brother's tone.

Sighing, Lovino replied, "No, I'm just on my break right now. I have to work a late shift tonight."

"Oh, okay! But you sound like you're standing out in the rain; you should get inside soon so you don't get sick!" Feliciano said.

Lovino gave a quick "Bye" and hung up the phone, looking back out at the road and waiting. He had lied again, and he could feel the guilt eating away at his insides, but he was doing what he felt was right. There was no place for him in the world; the only thing he could do right was earn money. Dropping out of school had caused some problems, both with his family and inside himself. But it hadn't only caused problems; it had helped solve some.

Or perhaps dropping out only helped him to think he had solved them.

He was lost in thought for a while, and it was not until he heard a car horn honk that he realized it was time to get going. Pulling the car door open, Lovino sat down right away, not even bothering to apologize for being soaking wet, let alone offer thanks for the ride. A few silent minutes passed as the car began to move, and Lovino closed his eyes, trying to put himself in the right frame of mind for his job – his awful job that he had to work if he wanted to…

The rain began to hit the car harder, and as Lovino glanced forward, he realized that it was getting rather hard to see the road with the way the rain was falling. It didn't matter much anyway, since they were almost to the place he called a 'job.'

Lovino pulled his soaking wet jacket closer around him and curled up in his seat, continuing to stare out the window as the car turned a corner and pulled into the parking lot. He refused to acknowledge that he had arrived until he heard the car engine turn off and the passenger door open.

Sighing, Lovino looked into the face of the man that had driven him. "You can't stay in my car all night, Romano," the man said.

"I can if I want to, Tempest," Lovino growled.

He didn't mean to seem ungrateful for the ride; he just never liked being here. Lovino knew the other man would probably get annoyed with his harsh treatment if he didn't take pity on him. Lovino dragged himself out of the position he had curled up into and pulled his jacket as close to him as he possibly could to try to conserve any warmth it still retained. The two of them walked into the building to begin their shift.

Since it was almost time to begin work, he did not have much time to get ready. Lovino walked into the locker room and went to open his locker. He pulled out his uniform and placed his soaking wet jacket inside. Looking at the shiny black boots, short shorts, and short top, he let out a weak sigh. He hated what his "uniform" consisted of, but he had gotten all of his complaining about it out the first week he had it; after everyone got sick of hearing him bitch, he finally shut his mouth.

The other workers had really disliked him at first because of all his complaining, but even after all of his bitching and whining was over with, many of them still didn't like him. He had been told that most of the other workers were jealous of him, though he was never sure why. He was only average looking and a decent dancer, and he never wore fancy costumes like some of the women did.

Lovino pushed that thought out of his mind for the moment and focused on getting dressed. He could use the dressing room, which was attached to the locker room, but it was always full of people. After a while, Lovino had stopped caring about where he got dressed, as long as he got into his outfit and out of it again as fast as possible.

After putting on his shorts, Lovino slipped his leg into one of his knee-high stockings, pulled on his boot, then did the same for his other leg. He reached for his top, something that only slightly resembled a shirt; it simply went across his chest, barely covering his nipples. Looking into the mirror before leaving to greet the customers, Lovino felt faintly disgusted with himself.

Shivering slightly, even though he wasn't cold, Lovino held back tears of embarrassment and smiled as happily as he could as he walked into the packed room. Although most people kept their eyes on the stage as he walked in, he still felt his heart plummet as reality hit him, just like any other night. There was no escaping this hellhole – not for a long time – so he had better suck it up.

He was too used to this life now to feel any nerves as he walked over to the stage. Taking his place on stage as the music began to play, the only thing Lovino could do at this point was smile and put on the best show his body knew how.

* * *

**I hope you guys enjoyed that ^-^ and lets play a little game, shall we? Who can geuss what Tempest's real name is ;) I don't think I left many cules to figure it out, but I'm sure you guys can take a guess at who it is. See you guys next chapter!**


	2. All for Feli

**That didn't take long now did it ;) Okay everyone, chapter two here! But just fair warning, I'm not sure when the next time I will be updating is because school is starting up (but I'll do my best!)**

**Disclaimer:I do not own Hetalia  
**

**Speical thanks to _Chi Kyoku _for Beta-reading this for me**

* * *

**Chapter Two**

The night wore on, and Lovino danced as well as he could. He clung to the pole in front of him as if for dear life and gently slid his body around, placing himself on the floor. His body moved in perfect timing to the music, and as the customers in front of him raped him with their eyes, all he could manage was a sweet, seductive smile and wink of the eye.

Lustful customers would hold out tips to him and the few other men on stage, and with the best smile he could, he would gladly take the money from their pig-like hands. Every so often, one of the men in the crowd would place their hands on him; for a moment, he would tense up, but then he would continue as if nothing happened, grinning a mischievous smile at the one that touched him. After a few more minutes, the song he was currently dancing to ended, and Lovino smiled at the perverted men around him as he slipped off the stage.

He quickly made his way back to the locker room, ready to change and be on his way.

"That was an interesting show you put on tonight."

Lovino pulled off his outfit, not caring that he was being watched. "Whatever. Are you going to fucking take me home or what?" he growled.

"Sadly, I still have a private customer coming in soon, so you either have to wait for me or find another way home. I'm sorry, Romano." Tempest walked over to him, ruffled his hair a bit and smiled down at him.

Lovino pulled on his pants and stood up. "I'll take the bus home." He pushed past Tempest after putting his shirt on, not noticing the sad look the other man was giving him.

Watching Lovino walk away, Tempest sighed. "I feel sorry for you. You're still such a child, after all."

Lovino did not hear his last comment as he walked out the door and stood in the cool night air. The rain had calmed down a bit and now only light drizzle fell from the sky, but the air was still cold, and his jacket was still slightly damp. He pulled it on and shivered, making his way out towards the parking lot.

Tempest was the only person who ever drove him anywhere, ever. Lovino didn't trust anyone where he worked but Tempest. Lovino never showed it, but he greatly appreciated everything Tempest did for him. Though neither of them knew the others' real name, they still managed to be, in Lovino's eyes at least, friends.

Lovino pulled the damp jacket tight against him as he shivered. Thinking back, he couldn't even remember how old the coat was anymore. He laughed for a moment, remembering reading a short story back when he was still in school: _The Overcoat (__**1**__)_ or something like that.

"That man was an old fool... an old, poor fool who couldn't so much as afford a new coat for himself, and just…died…." Lovino sighed. "I guess we're not that different after all."

Kicking away a rock in front of his foot, Lovino stopped and stared at the ground. There were only a few more days until the beginning of December, and he still hadn't picked up the Christmas presents he wanted to get for his family. Lovino already knew what he was getting for his father; he was planning on buying it in a few more days. However, Feliciano's present was going to be a bit trickier. With most of his paycheck going to his father to help pay for any extra needs around the house, Lovino was sometimes left with next to nothing. This was the reason he had taken this job in the first place.

The wind blew fiercely around him, making Lovino whimper as he attempted to walk to the bus stop. If he hurried, he could catch the last bus home. He touched his back pocket and pulled out his wallet; removing his bus pass, he gripped it tightly in his hand. Further down the street, Lovino could see that the bus was approaching the stop; he had about another minute to make it across the street.

Not bothering to look both ways before crossing the street, Lovino ran to the bus stop just as the bus pulled up alongside. He boarded the near-empty bus, swiped his bus pass though the scanner, and took a seat at the back. A few minutes passed and he felt himself growing drowsy. Pinching himself, he quickly opened his eyes and tried staring out the window.

Pulling out his keys, Lovino quietly entered his apartment through the front door. As silently as he could, he walked to his bedroom, pushed the door open, and took his shoes off. Hearing his brother softly snoring away on the top bunk, Lovino let out a long yawn and felt the need for sleep overcome him. He stripped off his clothing and let it hit the floor, not even caring that his waiter uniform would have wrinkles the next day.

Lovino let his head hit the pillow and almost instantly fell asleep.

* * *

**Three Weeks Later** – **December 23****rd**

Lovino stared with wide eyes at his boss. "Wh-what do you mean, I don't get my pay until next week!" he growled.

His boss looked at him and sighed. "Unfortunately, because of the snow storm, we had to spend a lot of unnecessary spending for damages this week. We can't get paychecks out until next week. I'm sorry, Lovino."

Lovino felt his heart sink as he stared at his boss. He needed that paycheck. He had already bought and wrapped his father's present, but he still needed to pick up Feliciano's, and he needed that paycheck to do it. As he left the office, he could feel tears of frustration building up behind his eyes. Making his way to the locker room, he pulled on his jacket and went to leave. Tempest had gone on vacation and had warned him that he would need to find his own ride for a while.

Snow had fallen over the streets, and the cold quickly seeped through his thin jacket. Lovino pulled it as tightly around himself as he could and made a dash for the bus stop. He felt his heart sink even further into his stomach, knowing that he would not be able to afford Feliciano's gift. Sure, Lovino was mean to him, never showing that he cared and basically bullying his younger brother, but that didn't mean he hated him. Far from it.

He loved his little Feli so much; he had done so much already to prove that. Feliciano just did not realize it, and Lovino could never tell him. Feliciano would never realize that the reason he would be going to college was because his older brother had to work both as a waiter and a stripper. Lovino had to let dirty, filthy men touch him and see his naked body, all so his little Feli would never have to do the same things for his family. When Lovino's baby brother grew up, he could make something of himself, something Lovino knew he himself never would.

Reaching the corner, Lovino finally had to stop walking. Tears began pouring from his eyes as he realized that he was a horrible brother for not saving money early enough for the present. He leaned up against the side of a building for support, thinking of what Feliciano's face would look like when he woke up Christmas morning and discovered that his brother didn't care about him enough to get him a gift. Lovino thought about how Feliciano would wake him up early in the morning to see what their father had gotten them. He thought about how Feliciano would hand him his present, and he would have nothing to give him in return.

Lovino smacked himself. He was being dumb; of course he could get something for his little Feli. It just wouldn't be what he had planned to get him. Pulling out his wallet, Lovino went through his bills to see how much he still had. After buying food for the week, paying Tempest for rides, buying his father's gift, and a few other expenses, he was left with only a little over fifty dollars.

Putting his head down in thought, Lovino considered taking some of the money he had put aside for Feliciano's college fund, but he wasn't sure if he should. He needed to make sure there was still plenty of money left for his brother to go to school. Before this, he hadn't spent so much as a single penny from Feliciano's college money, and he didn't want to start taking from it now.

"You're Romano, aren't you?"

Lovino looked towards the source of the voice, raising an eyebrow. "Yes? Is there anything you need?" He tried to sound polite; if it was someone calling him by his working name, then that must mean he was a customer, and Lovino had to be polite to the customers if he wanted a better tip next time.

The man walked over to him. He was wearing what appeared to be a sweet smile, but Lovino knew that look. It happened occasionally; men would wait outside for him when he left work, asking for some special "alone time", which always resulted in Lovino backing away in fear of being raped and Tempest pulling him into the car.

Lovino kept a pleasant smile on his face the entire time the man approached him, even when the dirty bastard placed his hand on his shoulder and brought him in closer to whisper in his ear. "I've had my eyes on you for a few days now. You're so sweet looking; I would assume one like you has never done it before."

Lovino's eyes widened in shock. Not knowing what to say, he tried to take a breath, but felt as if the air around him was too thick to take in. He was scared.

"Come on. It's almost Christmas. You please me, I'll please you. I'm happy, you're happy, and as an added bonus, you get to walk away with a bit of extra cash in your pocket."

Lovino should have pushed him away, he should have just ran, he should have done something other than just stand there. "H-how much…?" he asked. He felt weak for hesitating; he was stronger than that, damn it!

"Oh, that's the spirit." The man let his hand fall to grab Lovino's, who willingly let himself be dragged away. The mystery man held Lovino's hand all the way to his car, where he told him to get in so they could talk about the details of payment.

Inside the car, Lovino tried to breathe, but the thickness of the air still felt too hard to swallow. Looking away from the man with his head down, he said, "I won't accept anything below two hundred and fifty dollars."

The man smiled. "Sounds about right, but I'll pay you three hundred if we don't use a condom."

Lovino hesitated again for a moment, then nodded. He needed that money to show his brother that he loved him. Closing his eyes tightly as the man began to drive the car away, Lovino clenched the handle of the car door with his fist. He still couldn't breathe and the world around him had begun to blur together. His head felt like it was spinning, and the feeling of rocks beating his heart was unbearable.

The car rolled to a stop about twenty minutes later. "You don't need to know my name, so you can just call me John (**2**)." the man said. Parking the car in the lot of his apartment complex, John walked around to the passenger seat and gently pulled Lovino out of the car.

Lovino held the older man's hand as he led him into his home, looking him over. John had slightly long, shaggy brown hair and green eyes; he looked to be in his late forties. The arm that pulled him into the house was slightly toned, with an olive complexion. Though he was much older than himself, Lovino noticed that he was still very attractive.

John silently led him through the living room and into the back of the house. Through the darkness, Lovino could make out a few items as they passed, like the small aquarium of turtles near the kitchen. They entered the bedroom at the end of the hall and John sat on the bed, smiling at Lovino.

"I paid for a show; now I expect to see one." John's sweet face dropped its act as he put on a more serious tone. "But keep quiet; there are people here that are trying to sleep."

Lovino nodded, head down. His hand reached up to his jacket, shaking badly. He did not want to do this, but he would for his Feli. Lovino sucked in a deep breath and unzipped his jacket, letting it fall to the floor. He ran his hand down his chest to the bottom of the shirt and pulled that off as well. Then he continued taking off the rest of his clothes until he was standing naked in the room.

John stared at his body, wearing a creepy smile. Lovino tried to give off as much confidence as he could as he stood there, but the way John's eyes looked at his body made him feel sick. He wanted this to be over now, before it had even begun. "Can we start?" Lovino asked nervously. John had been right about one thing: he really had never done this before, not with a man or a woman.

"Aren't we an impatient one?" John motioned for him to come over, still smiling.

Lovino walked over to the man and stared at him for a moment before sitting down on the bed next to him. John's hands slid over his bare leg and near his lower parts. Lovino couldn't stop himself from making small whimpers of discomfort as he let the older man do this to him. He had to be brave.

_ I really do love you, Feli, and one day I'll tell you that._

Lovino lay back onto the bed, and watched with disgust as the other man crawled on top of him.

* * *

(1) -"**The Overcoat**" is the title of a short story by author Nikolai Gogol published in 1842. The story and its author have had great influence on Russian literature , thus spawning Fvodor Dostoyeysky's famous quote: "We all come out from Gogol's 'Overcoat'." The story has been adapted into a variety of stage and film interpretations." (Wikipedia)

(2)- The customers of prostitutes are known as _johns_ or _tricks_ in North America and _punters_ in the British Isles. ( Wikipedia)

**So what do you guys think ;) tell me what's going on in your heads people ( I'm not a mind reader, I don't know what your thinking about the chapter lol ) Oh btw, I had a bit of trouble trying to put into words how Lovino feels about his brother, and to me it came out as being that he "is in love" with his brother rather than "he loves his brother." So I just wanted to let you all know that he loves his brother in a brotherly way, nothing more. Also what are your thoughts on the "Mysterious Man" John?**


	3. Two Bastards for the Price of Two

**New Chapter! Ahhh, this took a lot longer then I thought to write T.T I just felt like I had massive writer's block and every time I wrote something it just didn't feel right! So frustrating xD, but nonetheless! It's done! Enjoy my readers ;)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia**

**Thanks to _Chi Kyoku_ who beta-read this for me ^-^**

**

* * *

Chapter Three**

**March 17****th****-2008**

Lovino walked into the kitchen and sighed. His feet were hurting and his back was sore, but he still had another hour before his shift ended. No one seemed to have realized that it was his birthday – not as if he cared if they wished him a happy birthday. That's what he told himself, anyway.

He had just been promoted from busboy to waiter. He had been excited about getting better pay, but he wasn't so sure anymore. The people he served always acted like jerks. They always left him with either no tip or an almost non-existent one, complaining about their food not being cooked the way they wanted (even if Lovino told the cook the correct order). What pissed him off the most was that he had to smile and pretend that he didn't really hate the world.

"Just forty-five minutes left," he whispered to himself. "Just a little bit longer, and I can go home." Lovino took a seat in the kitchen for a moment to rest his feet. He was beyond tired at this point.

After finishing his last table for the night, Lovino grinned madly; it was finally time to go home. He walked into the kitchen to grab his jacket from the closet. As he turned around, he came face to face with an all-too-familiar busboy.

"I noticed on the birthday sheet that your birthday was today, so I got you something!"

Lovino rolled his eyes and started to walk past, though he was secretly flattered that the new busboy had realized it was his birthday. The busboy reached out and grabbed his arm.

"You taught me how to be a better busboy when I was new. It made me pretty happy, so I wanted to make it up to you, Lovino! Even though you're a bit mean sometimes, I know, deep down, you're probably a good person."

The boy pushed a box into his hands and gave him a happy-birthday hug, waving him off afterwards. As Lovino began to walk away, staring down at the wrapped gift in his hands, he realized he had forgotten the boy's name. "What's your name again?" he asked.

The busboy smiled cheerfully and said, "Antonio!"

**7:30am, December 24****th****- 2010**

John had been rough on him. Lovino knew that he would have bruises on his hips by the time he got home, but he gripped his wallet tightly, knowing that the pain had all been worth it. He had simply left after John had finished having his way with him, and though the older man had offered to drive him home, Lovino had declined. Instead, he had dressed himself and left the apartment, heading towards the shopping district of the city.

He did not care that it had been snowing by the time he had started walking, nor did he care at this point that he had been forced to walk a long distance until he had reached his destination. However, he did care about how sore he was, and the cold had not been kind to him on the way here. Nevertheless, that had happened hours ago, so it didn't matter. What did matter was that, in another half an hour, Best Buy would open, and Lovino could finally get what he wanted to buy for Feliciano.

There were other people waiting outside as well, though they were sitting in warm cars while Lovino sat outside in the snow, waiting for the doors to open. Lovino pulled out his cell phone and checked the time impatiently. His mind wandered off to think of that bastard, John.

Something about him had seemed familiar. Lovino felt as if he had seen that man before – not only at the club, but somewhere else. John reminded him of someone, but Lovino couldn't figure out who, and it was driving him crazy.

"Gah! Like I fucking care," he whispered to himself. "I don't plan on seeing that jackass ever again…" He stared at the wallet, ashamed. He had sold himself for money; he had a reason, but was it really okay? Lovino was not sure about it anymore.

Time passed, and after another half hour, the doors opened and the eager customers rampaged the store. Lovino pushed his way over to the computer section of the store and looked for the model he had been staring at for the last few weeks. He had no idea what most of the information meant, but he did know that it had a webcam, wireless internet connections, and just about everything else his Feli would need in a computer. Looking around for a worker, Lovino found one walking around aimlessly and pulled him over, telling him which computer he wanted. The worker gladly handed it to him, and Lovino ran off with the computer in his arms to pay for it.

Lovino held the new computer in his arms as he walked down the street. He knew it was not the safest idea to carry around a brand new computer on Christmas Eve, but he had no other choice. There was a grand total of around twelve dollars left in his wallet as he walked through the front entrance of McDonald's. He bought himself a cheap breakfast item and looked around the restaurant for a power outlet, so he could help himself to the restaurant's free wifi.

The computer hummed to life as he turned it on. Though Lovino had never set up a computer before, he was sure that he would be able to get it going. After about ten minutes of glaring and growling, he realized that he was having problems getting the damn thing to work. Not wanting to give up just yet, Lovino continued working, determined to get the computer to work – that is, until he heard a familiar voice.

"Lovi!" Lovino cringed as two arms wrapped themselves around him from behind, pulling him into a tight hug. "I've missed you!"

Lovino growled and attempted to push the other man off him. "I just saw you the other day, jackass." He rolled his eyes as his co-worker, Antonio, sat down next to him.

"I know, but I love seeing your face every day. It makes me smile," Antonio said cheerfully. He smiled his typical huge smile, green eyes sparkling with life.

Lovino stared at Antonio's eyes. He always loved looking into them – not that he would tell him that. They were always so green and full of life, just like Antonio. That was probably why Lovino hated being around him sometimes; the guy was always so damn happy.

But something was different about the way Lovino found himself looking at Antonio today. He stared at his charming smile, his bright green eyes, the way his hair curled around his face, and the tanned skin of the arm that held him in a tight hug. Lovino closed his eyes as he pictured the events from the night before. He knew it was not Antonio's fault that he was making him uncomfortable, but he couldn't help but want the other man to move away from him.

"So, what's with the computer?" Antonio stared at the computer, then at Lovino.

"It's for my brother. But I'm having trouble setting it up…" Lovino looked at Antonio, then turned away, blushing. At work, he sometimes found himself staring at Antonio, but he would always turn his head away when he realized what he was doing. Antonio, Lovino told himself, was not into men, and neither was he. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

"Oh! I forgot! I was supposed to order our food." Antonio slapped himself upside the head and smiled, looking embarrassed. "I got a bit distracted when I saw you. Hey, I know! My dad and I aren't doing anything today for Christmas Eve. You can come to my place, and I can help you set up the computer!"

Lovino almost objected, but when he looked into those green eyes, he felt his heart melt, and he nodded meekly. Antonio left to order his food as Lovino let out a sleepy yawn. He knew that the first thing he was going to do when he got home was to go to sleep for a nice, long time.

It didn't take long for Antonio to come back with a bag in his hand, telling Lovino that it was time to go. He gently nudged Lovino awake from his half-asleep trance and pulled him out to the car. They walked out the front entrance and over to the driver's-side door so that Lovino could meet Antonio's father. Lovino looked at the tinted windows, waiting for the man inside to roll them down.

His heart dropped and his eyes widened when he saw the man behind the wheel.

"Dad, this is my friend, Lovino, from work," Antonio said, smiling.

"Oh, hello Lovino. Nice to meet you." Antonio's father held out his hand, smiling what Lovino thought to be a wide, creepy smile. "It's always a pleasure to meet Toni's friends."

Lovino bit back a growl, clenching his teeth. _Damn it_, he thought, _it's that bastard from last night_. Looking away from the man, he said "Nice to meet you, too. But I should get home." He tried to walk off, but Antonio stopped him.

"But, Lovi! I was going to help." Antonio looked at him, pushing his lower lip out to make himself seem cuter. It was working, but Lovino still attempted to push him off.

"I have to go. Thanks, but no thanks."

Antonio wouldn't let him go so easily; he kept insisting that Lovino come over, babbling about how wonderful it would be if they could spend some time together and try to be better friends. Lovino, not wanting to stand and argue in the cold any longer, reluctantly agreed and slid into the back seat of the car. He let his head hit the window and waited for the car to pull up to the apartment complex. As it moved down the street, Lovino closed his eyes, feelings from the night before starting to flood his mind.

A cool rush of air brought him back to reality as Antonio held his hand out to help him out of the car. Lovino turned his head away from the hand and pulled himself out of the car without any help, then looked to Antonio, waiting for him to start leading the way. With a cheerful smile, Antonio pulled on Lovino's arm and started walking towards the house. The entire way Lovino could not help but think of how similar this felt to the night before.

They entered the house and walked past the turtles, just like last night, though this time Antonio pulled Lovino into his room instead. "Okay, now let's see that computer, Lovi," he said.

"My name is Lovino, not Lovi, you jackass," Lovino replied.

"Aww, but you let Feli call you Lovi!" Antonio whined.

Growling, Lovino looked away. "You're not allowed to call him that, either. Knowing Gilbert does not give you the right to be on friendly terms with my brother, even if he's dating that dipshit's younger brother."

Antonio rolled his eyes as he began messing with Feliciano's computer. Lovino stared at him as he worked. They had known each other since Antonio had begun working at the restaurant. Lovino remembered how everyone, even him, had been too busy to help Antonio on his first day. But, after seeing him struggle, Lovino had begun to feel bad and had taken pity on him. Giving in and sucking up his pride, he had managed to teach Antonio a few tricks that he had learned over the past year working as a busboy... but not before cursing him off first, to try to assert his dominance over him.

And that was all it had taken. Ever since that day, Antonio had followed him around like a lost puppy. Not that Lovino minded most of the time; the guy made for pretty interesting company. They never really did things together; Antonio would mostly just talk to him on their breaks. A few times the two of them and Feliciano had attended the Beilschmidt brothers' birthday parties together, because Antonio was friends with Gilbert and Feliciano was dating Ludwig. Still, Lovino had never trusted Antonio, and now, after last night, he was left wondering if the other boy was as innocent as he seemed.

* * *

Antonio easily figured out how to hook Feliciano's computer up to the internet. After finishing that, he changed the desktop background for Lovino. He also started uploading pictures of Lovino and Feliciano from his camera. "Hey, Lovi, I'm done." He turned around to hand the computer back to Lovino, only to notice that his friend had fallen asleep on the bed.

Not wanting to wake him, Antonio pulled the blanket up around Lovino's shoulders. He stared down at the sleeping face of his co-worker, feeling his face heat up. Lovino looked peaceful: not at all the way he normally looked when Antonio saw him. His chest rose and fell with each breath he took, and as Antonio stared at him, he felt himself flushing harder.

Slowly, he leaned over the bed, tempted to kiss Lovino. Antonio hovered near the other man's lips for a moment, about to kiss him, but then decided not to. He ran his fingers through Lovino's soft hair and smiled at him, kissing his cheek instead. "You're so cute when you're sleeping, Lovi," he whispered.

Lovino rolled over in his sleep, his back now facing Antonio, as if mocking him. Antonio couldn't help but laugh as he moved closer to his crush. He reached for his remote and turned the TV on as he waited for Lovino to wake up. His fingers ran though his friend's soft locks, twirling around Lovino's long curl. Antonio twisted the curl around his finger as he played with it absentmindedly.

He kept his eyes glued to the program he was watching until he heard Lovino's cell phone ringing on his desk. As quietly as he could, Antonio reached over to pick it up, saw Feliciano's name on the caller ID, and answered it. "Hello?" he whispered.

"L-Lovino?" Feliciano asked, sounding somewhat shocked that someone other than Lovino had answered.

"Feli, it's Antonio. Lovi's sleeping right now. Do you need something?"

The line was silent for a moment before Feliciano answered. "Lovino wasn't home when I fell asleep, and he wasn't home when I woke up," he replied. "I'm sorry, Antonio! I was just really worried."

Antonio looked at Lovino, wondering what he should say. He did not want Lovino getting in trouble, but he was not sure if he should lie to Feliciano. "Oh, it's okay. Lovi spent the night here last night." He added a nervous laugh. "I told him to come over after work so he could help me do some last minute Christmas shopping, but it got late, and by the time we brought everything back here, we both kind of just fell asleep." He tried to make his lie seem believable; fortunately, it was Feliciano, so Antonio was sure it had convinced him.

"Okay! Just tell him to call when he's ready to come home. Ve~... Our dad wants to take us to dinner tonight!" Feliciano said his good-byes and hung up, planning on asking Lovino why he hadn't gotten home last night when he woke up.

Antonio's hand went back to messing with Lovino's curl. It had always interested him, and he had always wanted to play with it. As he kept his eyes on the TV, his finger twirled the curl around itself and tugged on it gently. He found it amusing that whenever he pulled on it, the curl would bounce back into place.

"Ahhh..."

Antonio looked down and noticed the deep blush on Lovino's face. His eyes were half-closed now; it looked as if he was barely even awake yet. Antonio tugged on the curl a bit harder, to see what kind of reaction he would get.

"Chigi!" Lovino shot up from the blanket and glared at Antonio.

"Are you okay?" Antonio asked, staring at his friend's flustered face.

"Don't touch that!" Lovino yelled. Standing up, he pulled on his jacket and shoes, grabbed his cell phone and Feliciano's computer, and headed for the door. Antonio reached out and pulled Lovino back. "Let go, jackass!"

"Merry Christmas, Lovino," Antonio said.

Lovino blushed as they locked eyes. It was getting hard to breathe with Antonio looking at him like that, so he closed his eyes, trying to block out the other man's face. "Whatever," he replied. "Merry Christmas. Now let me go…"

Antonio was silent for a moment. Lovino had just opened his eyes to yell at him to let go when he felt his lips captured by the other man.

**March 17****th****- 2008**

Lovino sat outside the restaurant, waiting for his family to arrive. He pulled his legs up to his chest in boredom. It was getting late, and there was birthday cake waiting for him at home. He knew Feliciano would be going crazy by now, wanting to open up their birthday presents. Every year, Lovino wondered why he and Feliciano had the same birthday, even though he was now turning seventeen and Feliciano was only turning sixteen. He figured that either their parents had forgotten their birthdays, or they had simply planned something. Either way, Feliciano was always a pain in the ass when their birthday was involved.

Lovino was starting to get a bit nervous; his dad was taking longer to pick him up than normal. A car was parked near the entrance where he was waiting. The person inside had their tinted windows slightly down, and the shadow of the person seemed to be looking right at him. This was not the first time Lovino had seen that car. It appeared every so often, and he hadn't really paid attention to it before, but recently it had started bothering him that it was there. It was as if the person inside was watching him.

A few more minutes went by. His father was way beyond late picking him up. Lovino pulled out his cell phone, texted his father that he would take the bus, and shoved it back in his pocket angrily. Right now, he just wanted to get away from that creep in the car.

Lovino arrived home about forty-five minutes later and walked into the apartment, expecting to be tackled by his little brother and confetti to drop down onto his head. When neither of the two happened, he suddenly got worried. He looked around the apartment for Feliciano and his father, but they weren't there.

When he had ascertained that neither of them were there, Lovino called Feliciano's cell phone. After a few rings, his brother finally picked up.

"Lovino…"

Feliciano's voice sounded far away, and Lovino's eyes widened. What was going on?

"You have to come quick! Dad's in the hospital!"

* * *

**So, good? Bad? What did you guys think ;) Also, tell me how many of you thought that Spain was going to end up being John lol. And just so you know, don't think that he's made his last appearance either -evil laughter-And to _Faded-Sha__dow_, good job geussing right on who John really was lol_._ Cya guys next chapter!**


	4. Feli's Perfect Gift

**Gosh you guys! I was so uber slow writting this one . I feel bad. But, at lest its out...right...right? But nonetheless,I do have school work and sleep so It's been kinda hard to update like I was durring vacation T.T but! Enough of my ramblings, on with the chapter!**

**Disclaimer:I do not own Hetalia  
**

**Speical thanks to _Chi Kyoku _for Beta-reading this for me**

* * *

**Chapter Four**

**December 24****th** – **2010**

Antonio pressed his lips fully against Lovino's as his arms wrapped around the other man's middle, pulling him close. He wasn't sure what he was doing, but he wanted this so badly. He didn't feel Lovino kissing him back, however. Opening his eyes, Antonio saw the horrified look on Lovino's face as he kissed him. He could feel the arms on his stomach trying to push him away, and after a moment, he pulled back.

"Wh-what the hell?" Lovino asked, breathless. His eyes were wide in what seemed to be either fear or shock, and he stood at least five feet away from Antonio now.

Antonio looked away, ashamed at having done something so selfish. "I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry." Lovino looked at him, shaking. They locked eyes for a moment again, and Antonio could tell that he was making Lovino uncomfortable. He reached out to put his hand on the other man's shoulder, but Lovino pulled away, eyeing the door. "Lovi, please…" he started.

"That's not my name!" Lovino yelled. "You have no fucking right to call me that!" He looked very uneasy as he made his way over to Feliciano's computer, placed it inside its box, and grabbed his cell phone off Antonio's desk. Without looking back, Lovino put the box under his arm and made his way out of the bedroom and out the front door as fast as he could.

Sighing, Antonio sat back down on the bed and held his head in his hands. What was he thinking, doing something like that?

A knock at his bedroom door brought him out of his thoughts. "Come in," he said.

His father walked into the room, looking worried. "Is something wrong? I just saw your friend run out." He sat down next to Antonio on the bed and placed an arm around his son. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

Antonio shook his head and sighed as he looked at his father. "Lovi… He just gets very angry sometimes. It's not a big deal." He felt his father pull him close and place a kiss on his forehead.

"Come on, why don't we go wrap the rest of the presents? Your aunt dropped some off that she couldn't hide in her house." Antonio nodded and smiled as he stood up and followed his father out of the room.

* * *

Lovino ran out of the house and as far away as he could. The freezing air invaded his lungs and he felt as if they were on fire. When he couldn't run any longer, he stopped and sat down at the nearest bus stop. He pulled his knees up to his chest and just thought. Why had he run away? It wasn't like he didn't like the feeling of Antonio kissing him, but... he just didn't know. Lovino touched his lips where the other man had placed his not too long ago, remembering the warmth pressed against them and the feeling he had felt in his stomach.

A blush crept its way onto his face as he buried his head further into his knees. _What am I, a damn woman? I'm not supposed to have guy troubles, damn it! _He thought. It was Christmas Eve; maybe he should just relax for once and try to control his anger. A car drove by him, splashing a mixture of snow and slush all over the sidewalk and Lovino. "Fuck you!" he yelled at the car. So much for trying to control his anger…

The entire time he waited at the bus stop, Lovino could not stop thinking about Antonio. He thought about his sparkling green eyes, the messy mop of soft, brown hair, and even the sweet way he would always call him "Lovi." Lovino growled in frustration and pulled at his hair. He was so confused. Did he hate Antonio, or did he possibly like him?

When the bus finally arrived, Lovino felt like his ass had already gotten frostbite, though, in reality, he knew it hadn't. He took a seat on the bus and looked around at the few people chatting sweetly to one another, talking about how Christmas this year was going to be the best yet. Gripping the computer close to his chest and smiling, Lovino also felt that this would be one of his better Christmases. He smiled as his hand ran down the cardboard box with Feliciano's present inside; closing his eyes, he could picture the smile that would grace his brother's face Christmas morning.

The bus rocked back and forth as it stopped, picked up and dropped off passengers, and kept going. Lovino kept the computer pressed firmly to himself, not wanting it to drop and break. He would do everything in his power to keep this computer safe and ready for his little Feli on Christmas morning.

Lovino got up from his seat when the bus arrived at his stop, left the bus, and began walking through the snow towards his apartment complex. He started up the stairs, pulled out his keys, and walked into his house. The moment he closed the threshold, Lovino almost fell to the ground as Feliciano tackled his side.

"Ve~…you're back!" Feliciano yelled. His eyes drifted down to the brown box in his brother's arms. "Huh? What's that?"

"None of your damn business!" Lovino yelled. Inwardly he felt a bit bad for yelling, but it was in his nature. He could just never be nice, it seemed.

Lovino pushed Feliciano off him, stormed off to their bedroom, shoved the computer gently under his bed, and crawled under his blanket, still fully clothed. He smiled contentedly, knowing that tomorrow would soon come, and he would be ready to wake up. All of his worrying was finally at an end with Feli's present tucked safely underneath him. All that was left now was to get some sleep.

If only it had been that simple.

"Lovi…" Feliciano gently shook Lovino's shoulder. "Lovi, are you asleep yet?"

Lovino rolled over and looked up. "What?" he asked with slightly unfocused eyes.

"I'm not sure if Toni told you, but Dad's going to take us out to dinner later, okay?" he whispered, as if his brother was actually asleep. All he got in response was a growl as Lovino rolled onto his stomach and buried his face in his pillow. Feliciano smiled and ran a hand though his brother's hair. "Sleep well, Lovi." He giggled, stood up, and climbed into his own bed.

* * *

"_Ahh… n-no, don't – neegghh, Antonio!" Lovino moaned. He felt his back arch involuntarily as Antonio's hand slid down his chest and he kissed at his neck. The other man slid his tongue across Lovino's collarbone, sucking at the soft skin there. Lovino could feel himself heating up as Antonio moved above him. _

_When Antonio's hand reached into his boxers, he almost cried out in shock. The hand started running down his inner thigh, gently stroking the soft skin. Lovino felt his breath hitch in his chest as Antonio's hand came closer to his slowly arousing member. When the hand finally made contact, Lovino could not hold back his deep moan._

"_Oh, someone's noisy, aren't they?" Antonio whispered in the other man's ear. His hand gripped the now throbbing member firmly in his hand. He felt the smaller man whimper below him as he slowly began pumping him, getting faster with each thrust. _

_Lovino heard himself moaning as his climax approached. One of Antonio's hands reached up and pulled at the curl that bounced as Lovino rocked his body in time with the thrusts. "I-I'm going to…" He could not even finish the sentence as he closed his eyes and arched into Antonio's hand, releasing himself fully._

_Panting heavily, Lovino let his back fall into the bed as he tried to catch his breath. He opened his eyes, looking up at the man above him. However, when he looked, Antonio was no longer smiling down at him. His eyes grew dark and his smile turned into an evil grin. "Oh, Lovi, I hope you didn't think we were finished just yet." Antonio winked at him._

_Antonio pulled away from him, moving back to stand in the corner of the room. Lovino looked around the room, frantic, wondering what was going to happen next. However, he didn't like what he found out._

_Closing his eyes, Lovino tried to move away. But, it wasn't as easy as he expected; two strong arms appeared and pinned him to the bed. Lovino felt the need to throw up. Hovering above him was that bastard, John. He was looking down at him, smirking. John's hands began touching him, running up and down his body just as Antonio's hands had done before. "Get away!" Lovino yelled. _

_Sitting up, Lovino tried to push on John's chest to get him to move away from him, but failed. John grinned down at him again. "You're nothing but a dirty whore," he whispered. "You fuck me and you want to fuck my son. You're sick, Romano." Lovino shut his eyes as he felt tears building up. _

"_That's not true!" He tried to get away, but he couldn't move. All he could do was keep his eyes closed and try not to show his weakness. "It's not true… it's not true," he whispered to himself. "Feli… Feli, I'm so sorry."_

_John leaned down and kissed Lovino's lips. "Your Feli hates you. He knows you're nothing but a whore. He hates you so very, very much." _

"_No! You're lying to me!" Lovino yelled, pushing his face into the blanket. "Feli loves me, and I love him. There's no way that he could ever hate me."_

"_Believe what you want, but I _am _telling the truth."_

_

* * *

_

Lovino sat up in his bed, panting. He looked around his room, sighing. "It… it was only a dream," he whispered. He fell back onto his bed and looked up at Feliciano's bunk. Normally he could tell if his brother was up there by the constant moving of the bed, but right now it seemed rather still, so he assumed that Feliciano was probably in the living room watching TV with their father or something. "I should get back to sleep," he said as he rolled onto his side, closing his eyes and trying to fall back asleep.

When the only sounds in the room were Lovino's soft snores, Feliciano leaned over the top bunk of the bed and stared down at his brother. He pulled himself gently and as quietly as possible off the top bunk, landing softly on Lovino's bed. Feliciano looked at his brother's sleeping face, and kissed his forehead. "Ve~… I don't know what you were dreaming about, but I don't hate you…"

Feliciano slid under the blanket with Lovino, hugging him as he fell asleep as well.

Lovino was busy wrapping Feliciano's present when his father poked his head into the bedroom. Lovino was already dressed for dinner, just waiting for his father to call him and his brother out to the car. He placed the final piece of tape on the present and looked up at his father. "Is that Feli's gift?" his father asked.

"And what if it is?" Lovino replied rudely. He stood up, holding the wrapped present in his hands.

His father smiled at him. "I was going to say, 'you're so sweet for buying him something,' but maybe I was wrong." He laughed as he teased his older son. Lovino huffed and walked past the other man towards their small Christmas tree.

Since they were always low on money, the Vargas family never had a large Christmas. For a while, it was always their father buying them each a present. As the years went on and the boys could afford presents, they also joined in the gift giving. Lovino looked at the five presents currently under the tree: two from his dad, two from Feliciano, and one from him. He placed the last present under the tree, looked around the room to see if anyone was watching, and smiled.

Feliciano ran out of the bathroom, hair brushed and dressed nicely. He stopped next to his brother and leaned over his shoulder. "Ohh! Is that what Lovi got me this year?" he asked, bouncing.

"Why the hell do you wanna know?" Lovino glared at him, the smile fading from his face.

Feliciano smiled brightly, eyeing the new present under the tree. "I was starting to think you didn't get me anything!" Lovino winced as his brother tightly wrapped his arms around him, arms pushing into some of the bruises from the night before.

Lovino let his head fall against his brother's shoulder as he hugged him. _I wouldn't forget about you, Feli, _he thought. He reached a hand to gently play with his brother's hair, but instead pushed him harshly away. "Whatever. I got Dad something, so I had to get you something. It's not a big deal, dumbass."

"Waah, stop being so mean!" Feliciano hugged him tighter as their father walked into the room.

"Are you boys ready to go? I'm sure the pasta isn't going to wait for you, Feli," he said as he stroked his younger son's hair sweetly. The boy smiled and began walking towards the door. Lovino looked one last time at the Christmas tree, and suppressed the urge to giggle, thinking about his brother's reaction the next morning. Their father walked out of the apartment after them; rushing to catch up with his sons, he threw the door closed behind him, running to his boys and neglecting to lock the door.

* * *

Antonio held his turtle in his hand, stroking its shell and staring at it. He was lonely and bored. Lovino had left in such a rush this morning that he hadn't even had time to give him the present he had picked out for him. Though, even if he had had the time, Antonio wasn't sure that he would have given it to him. "Ha… Lovi, why did I make you run away?" he whispered.

The turtle crawled off his hand and began walking around the bed. Antonio picked him up and placed him on the floor as he looked under his bed at the small wrapped present for Lovino. He pulled it out and let it rest on his lap. The gift itself wasn't all that great, but he was sure that Lovino, though he would never admit it, would at least think that it was cute.

He had found the gift while he was walking through the mall with his father last month, looking for Christmas presents. It wasn't anything special or eye catching, but he had noticed it anyway. When the vender had noticed Antonio looking at it, he had called him over to come look at it. Antonio, at that point, had realized it would be the perfect gift for Lovino.

"But… I bet he won't even use it," Antonio said gloomily as he put the box back under his bed. "And it'll be mostly because I'm too embarrassed to give it to him…"

This was driving him mad. On one hand, Antonio wanted to give something to Lovino, the boy he really, really liked, but on the other hand, he was too shy to give it to him. "Oh, Lovi! You're driving me crazy and you're not even here!" Antonio laughed a bit to himself and fell back onto his bed.

He rolled over onto his stomach and wondered if he should try stopping by Lovino's house the next day to drop off his gift. He was sure that he would be able to get the address from Gilbert.

"Ve~… Dinner was delicious! Thanks!" Feliciano hugged his father for what had to be the tenth time since dinner had ended.

"I can tell, Feli," their father replied, smiling at his younger son. "How many times have you told me already?" He kissed his son on the forehead as he walked to the front door of their apartment. Lovino stood next to his brother, pouting, as he did not want to admit that he had, in fact, also enjoyed dinner.

Laughing, his father placed his key in the door, turned it, and pushed it open. The three of them walked into the house, smiling with content, their bellies filled. Feliciano stumbled in the dark and reached over to turn the light on.

Lovino, Feliciano, and their father all stopped.

What they saw before them at that moment made their hearts stop as well. "Wh-what happened?" their father said as he walked around the apartment. The small tree they had set up lay toppled over in the middle of the living room, pillows were thrown off the couch, and other household items were spilled over the floor. But, what caught their attention the most was the absence of the presents near their toppled tree.

"Where we… robbed?" Feliciano asked, looking at his father.

"What the fuck do you think, you dumbass?" The younger brother looked to his side to see Lovino standing in the middle of the wreckage, shaking. "We were fucking robbed! Those fucking bastards are going to… are going to… are…" He fell to his knees, unable to speak, placing his face in his hands.

Feliciano sat down on the floor next to him, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Ve~ …don't be sad. They're only presents. We don't need them to be happy." He wrapped his arms around Lovino, pulling him close to his chest. "Shhh, Lovino, don't cry!"

Lovino did not attempt to move; he merely clung to his younger brother for support. "No, Feli, you don't understand," he whispered, mostly to himself. Lovino buried his face deeper into his brother's shoulder, wanting all the comfort he could get at this moment. This just wasn't fair! Why did he have to go through all that hard work just to have Feli's present taken away from him? Feeling a hand on his face, Lovino looked up to meet his brother's amber eyes.

"I don't need gifts to be happy." Feliciano hugged him tighter. "All I need is you, Lovino! And you called me Feli! It makes me so super happy when you do that! That alone can be considered the perfect present."

Lovino pushed away from his brother as he felt a new wave of tears coming. He had to get away, just for now at least. "I'll… be back later," he whispered. He stood up and walked out the door.

* * *

**March 17****th****-2008**

Lovino panted as he finally reached the waiting room. His eyes looked around the room for his brother, and when he noticed him crying silently, he ran over to him. "Feliciano, what the hell happened?" he demanded, out of breath.

Tears leaked from his eyes, but Feliciano remained quiet. Lovino, panicked, began shaking him. "Dad's hurt," Feliciano finally said.

"I think I know that!" Lovino screamed, not bothering to keep his voice down. "Why is he fucking –" He stopped mid-sentence as something caught his eye. "Feliciano… what happened to your arm?"

Feliciano pulled his arm, covered in a cast, into his lap and looked away. "N-nothing. I'm fine," he lied.

Lovino stared at him. "Feli," he said, using the nickname he hadn't used in years, "tell me what happened." His voice became softer and more caring. Lovino locked eyes with his younger brother as they both began to tear up again.

"We… we were coming to pick you up… when… a truck sped by and…" Feliciano stopped, unable to speak anymore. Lovino wrapped an arm around his shoulder, stroking his hair affectionately. He let his brother cry on him until he was ready to speak again. "Dad was taken in because he was more hurt then I was, but the doctor said he should be okay."

Right now, Lovino didn't care about his father; he cared more about his little brother. He looked down at him, knowing that he shouldn't be in the hospital for his sixteenth birthday. He should be doing something special at home, with their family. But no, Feliciano was here, and it was his fault.

Why couldn't he have just taken the bus home as he had ended up doing anyway? Was his laziness really the cause of his father and his brother now both being injured? It was too much to wrap his head around for the moment.

Lovino noticed the doctor walking their way, looking at his brother. The man stopped and looked at them both. He eyed Lovino for a moment, then, noticing their similar faces, asked for Lovino to talk to him in private. "What do you want?" Lovino asked, shaking.

"It's about their heath." He pointed back at Feliciano. "The thing is, your father won't be able to work for at least six months. He hurt his back in the accident and cracked a rib. As for your brother, he's lucky his arm is only broken. He'll heal fine, but it's going to hurt him for a while." Lovino nodded and bit his lip; he knew what the other man was going to say next. "I'll just say that, with your brother's arm alone and pills, your bill is going to be over…"

Lovino didn't hear anything after that. He stopped listening. His mind was blank. How would they be able to pay the bills if their father was out of work? They were already poor enough, fighting to meet their rent, and now, to top it all off, they would have to pay hospital bills as well? Lovino sighed. _What a fucking lovely birthday this was turning out to be._

_

* * *

_

**And that's the end!**

**No, not really lol. But tell me what you think you guys . But I do feel kinda bad for what I did to poor Lovi since somthing simular happened to me years ago. Someone broke into our house and stole all our presents D: and to think we where getting a dreamcast that year too! Lmao, but lucky for my parents they where able to get most of the presents back. lol, anway! ;) you guys have any predictions on what's going to happen next? Because I know what's going to happen next! -evil grin- I'll cya guys next chapter!**


	5. A Late Christmas Eve

**Hey you guys! This was so super late and I feel horrible for making you all wait like that D: I was on spring break last week and I wanted to get more of this story out before the end of the week, but I got held up with another Hetalia fic I was working on for my friend's birthday ( if any of you like AkaKiku, that's the paring xD though, I myself am more of an USUK fan...) But, anyway, here's the next chapter!**

**Disclaimer:I do not own Hetalia  
**

**Speical thanks to _Chi Kyoku _for Beta-reading this for me**

**EDIT: HEY GUYS! Sorry, I know it's been over a year since the last update, but as I was writing the next chapter, my computer crashed and I lost it. About two months ago I finally got my computer back, but after being away for so long, I forgot my login info Dx but I finally got back in! I'll update soon, just wanted to let you all know that I'll be updating shortly!**

* * *

**Chapter Five**

Christmas Eve night was surely freezing. Lovino sighed as he aimlessly walked the streets of the city, wanting to be anywhere but home. The tears had stopped running down his face long ago, and now he just stared blankly ahead, deep in thought. Why would someone do that? Why would someone want to purposefully ruin another family's Christmas? He held back a slight sob as he began to think about the feelings he had had when he had seen their distorted Christmas.

Lovino could feel his cell phone vibrating in his pocket, but he didn't bother answering it. The ringing echoed in the empty streets, void of any life besides him. Minutes passed and the phone did not stop ringing, but he was not going to answer it.

Buses had stopped running about an hour ago, and barely any cars drove by. The ones that did sprayed slush in his direction and didn't so much as slow down as they went past him. As he pulled his jacket tighter around himself and heard the old fabric of the jacket ripping, Lovino winced. "Damn, how fucking old is this thing anyway?" he whispered.

Taking a break and huddling into a small alleyway, Lovino tried to conserve as much body heat as he could. He tried to remember when he had even gotten the jacket. A cold breeze blew though the alley, and he shivered as he let his head rest on the wall behind him.

"This jacket…came from…" Lovino closed his eyes in thought, racking his mind to remember. "I think…I remember." He folded his knees up to his chest, thinking deeply and trying to get his thoughts away from what a terrible Christmas this was sure to be. "Feli gave it to me when I turned sixteen." Lovino buried his face into the worn cotton of his jacket, trying to bring that day back into his memory.

He had been in his bed, sleeping peacefully, when a large weight had suddenly pounded into his stomach. Feliciano had woken him up and pushed a small wrapped package into his chest. "Happy Birthday Lovino!" he yelled at him.

At the time, Lovino had not gotten anything for his brother, seeing as he had no job and no money to buy him anything. He looked at the present, firmly held in his brother's hand as it was pushed into his face. "Whatever. Just put it down and get out."

"Ve~… But we share a room!" Feliciano whined.

"I don't care." Lovino rolled over and pushed his head underneath his pillow, trying to block out his little brother.

Feliciano left the present at the end of the bed and looked sadly at his brother. "Well… Dad said that he wanted you to come down soon. He made us breakfast."

A pillow chucked at his head was the only answer the younger brother got. Without the aid of his pillow, Lovino ducked his head under his blanket and went back to sleep.

Lovino knew that, deep down, he had always cared about his little brother, despite how he had always treated him when they were younger. Almost every day, he realized again how much nicer he should have been to him. Growling in frustration, Lovino turned his head upwards and looked at the falling snow around him.

"I've taken… so much of my life for granted," he whispered. Gripping the jacket Feliciano gave him, Lovino let his head drop again, not wanting to stare at the falling snow.

"What now…?" he asked himself.

For a moment, he thought about going home. But he wasn't in the mood to see the crying faces of his family, so he crossed that off his list. Next, he thought about possibly trying to call Tempest on his cell; however, Lovino knew that the older man was not in town, so he crossed him off the list of people to call as well. Biting his lip, Lovino thought about the only other person that he somewhat considered as a friend.

He pulled out his phone and looked though his contacts to see Antonio's number, just waiting to be called. Lovino pulled in a deep breath, hovered his finger over the call button, and then closed his phone.

"No… He's probably pissed that I ran off this morning." Lovino could feel his heart pounding in his chest as he thought about Antonio. "Fuck!" he yelled as he slammed his phone into the ground. "I don't fucking need him!"

The phone smashed against the concrete. Sighing, Lovino picked up the phone to make sure that it was okay, only to realize that the screen was now cracked and completely blacked out. "Great, what do I do now?" Lovino stared down at the phone in his hand. Most of his numbers were not memorized, and he only had three numbers on speed dial.

With another sigh, he put the phone back into his pocket as it began to ring again. Even though he had a good idea about who could be calling, Lovino did not feel like talking to anyone now. The phone eventually went silent, and the only sound was his own breathing. The icy air felt like needles piercing his lungs as he breathed. The snow had not yet slowed in its pace.

"It's… cold. I wonder if I should go home…"

He stared at the falling snow, wondering what he should do. Christmas was ruined, and he really did not want to head home. For a moment he thought about possibly going to a friend's house, but then he realized that, after he had dropped out of high school, he had lost contact with everyone he knew from school.

"I don't need them, though. I don't need anyone… no one…"

He buried his face into his knees and began to cry again. The tears fell freely from his eyes as he tried to figure out what he was going to do. The most obvious thing to do was to go back home, but, as he told himself over and over again, he would not do that, for the simple reason that he was not in the mood to see his father and brother. He could feel his body rock with each sob he let fall from his lips.

"I have no one. I have nothing," he whispered to himself. He gripped his knees hard, nails digging deep into his jeans.

"I fucking screwed up everything. There isn't a fucking thing I can do right."

He let his head fall against his shoulder as his eyes began to droop.

"I'll forever be…useless Romano…"

* * *

There nothing more relaxing to do on a lonely Christmas Eve than to eat as much ice cream as you could buy with the small paycheck you earned each week, after having the one you loved run away and not answer your calls – or at least that was how Antonio felt about it. He rolled onto his stomach, pulling his carton of extra-chocolate-chip chocolate ice cream closer to his chest.

"Ah~ another lonely night," he sighed, taking a bite of the ice cream.

Antonio kept his eyes glued to the TV as he watched "A Christmas Story" for the fifth time that night. He was lonely, sure, but at least he had a half-eaten carton of ice cream and a marathon of his favorite Christmas movie to cheer him up. Another spoonful of the sugary treat was pushed into his mouth as he rolled onto his back to look up at the ceiling.

Though he really did enjoy watching this classic movie, he would much rather have someone to watch it with. Putting the lid on and placing the entire carton on the floor, Antonio rolled onto his side, facing the wall.

"Lovi, why do you always run away from my love?" he asked himself.

He ran a hand down his stomach, fingers lingering on the button of his pants. Quickly unbuttoning them, he began to slide his legs out of the garment. With his eyes closed, Antonio slid his hand slowly into his boxers, gasping lightly when his hand made contact with his slowly growing member. He bit down on his lower lip as thoughts of Lovino began to fill his head.

He was lonely – he needed someone, _something_ to ease the empty feeling inside him.

Gently, Antonio slid his hand down himself, gripping tightly at his base and pulling up. He slowly stroked himself, rubbing his fingers over the tip of his member, then back down. He pushed his face into his pillow when his hand began speeding up, attempting to stifle his moans. With his free hand, he rubbed his stomach, trying to get every bit of pleasure that he could out of it.

"Ahh… L-Lovino…" he whispered.

His breath began to hitch as he felt his climax nearing, and he started pumping even faster. Moaning softly, Antonio arched into himself when he knew the time was about to come. However, the sound of a ringing cell phone interrupted his fancies. He was close, but that phone – it was ringing. He could not stop, but he had to.

Stopping himself, Antonio sighed, knowing that he probably wouldn't be able to start again. He reached over to his desk to answer the call. Looking at the caller ID, he noticed that it was Feliciano. "_Hola_, Feli, is there something you need?" Silence. "Feli? Are you there?"

"Y- yes, I'm here," Feliciano's voice whispered back into the phone. "Is Lovino there?"

Antonio could hear the slightest bit of a sniffle in Feliciano's voice. Wondering what had happened, he responded, "No, what happened?"

More silence, then a slight sob. "He…. ran off. And he won't answer his phone," Feliciano told him.

Antonio was not sure what to think of that. He talked to Feliciano for a while, trying to calm the now-crying boy. Near the end of the conversation, he even volunteered to try to look for Lovino. After hanging up the phone, Antonio pulled his pants back around his waist, then began looking for his shoes. He found them a moment later, near his closet with his socks still stuffed into them from that morning.

A soft sigh escaped his lips as he smiled. "Oh, Lovi, I wonder what you are getting yourself into right now." He pulled on his shoes, grabbed his jacket off his desk chair, and pulled it over his shoulders. "Well, whatever it is that you are up to, I'll be there to find you." He giggled to himself as he left to try to find Lovino.

* * *

**So, there's that. D: Sorry of the shortness of this chapter, I feel as if I failed you guys for making you wait so long then leaving it off like this~ **

**But! I would like to say that I forgot about something that I had planned since the first chapter ( I so forgot to tell you guys about this, I'm sorry! ) but I have a little game for you guys. The rules are simple:**

**1: I'll ask a question at the end of some chapters, and you guys have to try and answer them.**

**2: If you are the first person to answer the question right, you get 1 point. **

**3: The person with the most points at the end of the story( I'll say in the last chapter of the story who the winner is ) will get a request one-shot fic for any Hetalia paring with whatever plot they want.**

**4: You have to have a FF acount to play, because if you don't I can't respond to you D: I'm sorry!**

**Well, anyway, I hope that this game interests you guys :3, Have fun!**

**( btw, since I forgot to tell you guys about this sooner, I'll count the geusses for quesitons I've asked in other chapters as well.)**

**So, I guess I'll ask you guys a question for the chapter, hmm?**

**Here goes: Who will find Lovino first ( if at all ?)  
**


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